Be The Verb

when we lost

our son

we lost

each other

~

we were shells

empty

hurting

voids

~

different ways

of grieving

disconnected

us

~

our raw pain

forced unrealistic

expectations

upon ourselves

~

feeling

emotionally abandoned

unable to help

heal

~

I’m sorry

I let you down

when you needed

me

~

I’m learning

to forgive

myself

~

be the verb

~

Believe

we all fear

becoming

what we fear

~

vulnerable

~

trust

our ignorance

in love

~

be still

keep dancing

life will not always

make sense

~

learn to love

our contradictions

we’re nothing

we’re everything

~

find comfort

in doubt

sometimes

it’s the only light

we’ll ever have

~

believe

“I learn by going where I have to go” ~ theodore roethke

~

Colour Theory

maybe

there’s no

black and white

~

merely labels

accumulating all colour

to absence of all

~

tick the box

there’ll be no logic

no right or wrong

when you’re with me

~

sharing

communicating

birds calling moons

painting sunrises

together

~

one

with love

believing

trusting

each other

~

I want

to start

a new religion called

maybe

~

colour theory

~

Heart Ache

postpartum

spontaneous coronary

artery dissection

~

I held our newborn

watching you

~

surrendering, she asked,

“what’s this all about?

closed my eyes, sighed,

“become comfortable in doubt.”

~

tubes, machines

fast-forward-etch-a-sketches

seismographic skyscrapers

~

so hard

to talk

much easier in code

~

Heart Ache

Heart Ache

~